OPERATION: LDS

As a writer/wannabe-screen-writer/wannabe-film-maker/wannabe-journalist/secret agent, I have always wanted to infiltrate some sort of wayward faction here in the US of A. Sign up, join their ranks, hang out, learn what makes them tick, then write something about it for the masses.

This one dude, Kevin Roose, infilrated Liberty University: the nation's most strict christian college, and wrote about it(It's called "the unlikely disciple" and it's friggin' awesome!).

Me on the other hand, I have more...bold tastes.

Years ago I plotted to infiltrate a local scientology church, but then multiple people warned me of the dangers involved(now I pretty much ignore those warning LOL).

Then I wanted to infiltrate a local S&M group that met at the Denny's every tuesday night. You'd be amazed at who are actually involved in this shit: local bussinessmen, judges, politicians, and other people you'd least suspect, even Father O'Malley!(J/K).

But recently, inspired by a Middle Eastern Comedian(Aron Kader of Axis of Evil), yesterday while bored at work I decided to research what it would take to infiltrate the Mormon Church and become a missionary.

After reading the requirements, I came to a few conclusions, being the Rogue Christian-Remix that I am:

1. Fuck that shit.

2. I REFUSE to bunkmate with some weirdo guy for 2 years

3. I refuse not to touch a woman affectionately for 2 years: I'm engaged people!

4. I'm way too old. I'm 29 in 8 days. The average age for starting missionary training is 18!

Still I think it'd be funny, considering I find it hard to believe that you can read just ONE BOOK and "get it".

Til next time, Xander, out.