Memorial Day Antics: 1

After a night of clubbing I was nice and cozy asleep on the futon, my world was shattered and I was jolted courtesy of Steve, Link's youngest brother who flew in from Boise State.

"Wake up!" he said.

"Grrrr"

"Come on we're going hiking!"

"Mmmm no."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm sleeping. Besides, I don't have the shoes for it."

"Just wear your sandals"

"Noooooo"

and the fucker kissed me on the cheek, much to my annoyance.

It was not immediet, but effective: I was now pissed off and I couldn't get back to sleep.

Before I knew it dawning Abercrombie Sandals, a white cap and sunglasses we all packed into the car and headed out to the hills above the Pacific Ocean.

I was running on about 5 hours sleep and was not thrilled.

But, I held my ground and the Xander you all know was ready to go in no time, and off we went: the hike began!

This place, it is is so awesome, I can't reveal its location here. BUT, they got camping facilities, hot, but once you get to the top you can see the northern tip of the valley and the rolling white-crest waves of the pacific ocean, topped with a nice cool pacific breeze that acts like a A/C.

Despite the fact my feet were torn up and killing me, the view made it totally worth it, but I was not to the top yet, which was, later learned to be around the bend.

"Go on without me Steve"

"C'mon!"

"Dude, I have blisters the size of Montana!"

"Fine. Be a bitch. Hold my cell phone. I'll come back in a bit. Ok?" He said, tossing it to me.

"Got it." I said catching it. I watched as he disapeared around the turn.

Now, for those of you who have been following my stories or know me really well, you would know I'm only truely happy when I'm doing something truely nuts!

So I got an idea: I began scrolling through Steve's contact list with a evil grin on my face, til I came upon a name of a girl: Amber.

"Hmmm" I thought. "Amber sounds hot. She's perfect!"

I then proceeded to text her the following:

"Question, why haven't we had sex yet?"

Her response: "WTF"

Later, Link came down from the top and I began to hike back down with him. During this time I told him what I did.

Though he chuckled, he couldn't help but give me words of wisdom: "You know he's going to kill you, right?"

I laughed. It was well worth it.

Later, Link ran ahead to catch up to his dad and I met up with Link and my god mother. There, I told them what I did, and it went something like this:

Xander: Uh, Steve, I did something bad(chuckle)
Steve's Mom: (gasp)
Steve: What did you do?

Xander: I scrolled through your contact list and sent a girl a text message. Who's Amber?
Steve's mom: (GASP)
Steve: YOU WHAT!? DUDE, WHAT DID YOU SAY!?

Here it comes...

Xander: I texted her: "Question, why haven't we had sex yet?"
Steve's mom: (GASP!)
Steve: YOU WHAT!!!!??? DUDE! SHE'S NOT HOT! SHE'S UGLY! (Steve's mom gasps again in disbelief) SHE'S DONE MOST OF THE BASKETBALL TEAM, HALF THE FOOTBALL TEAM, AND ONLY LIKES BLACK DUDES

Xander and Steve's mom, and even Steve: (laughs!)

From there on the walk down we had some great discussions, such as:
-How we should get Steve's Uber-Catholic Mom hella' high
-How there is not a divine force on this planet that will shut me up
-The Drug Antics of Willie Nelson and how if I had the chance I would get high with him("But dude! How many people can honestly say they got stoned with Willie Nelson")

It was a awesome day. Para mi familia segundo: Te amo!
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Later we were cooking for a dinner party and cleaning the kitchen, while Link was getting chicken out of the fridge to put on the grille.

Link: Uh oh, something is leaking out here
Me: That's what SHE said.

(Steve, Link, me, Steve's mom bursts out laughing)

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I ate til I was full and passed out. I even dreamt. I woke up to Steve's cousin yapping on her cell phone. I have tomorrow off: Steve went off with another friend, Link has work tomorrow and Link's other brother is just "wanting to relaxed". So here I sit. We'll see what crazy adventure I can come up with. When I do, I'll keep you posted.

Xander, out.